Police vs. Citizens

There has been so much violence reported in the past week.  We have people killing each other left and right it seems.  We have divided people into groups and then somehow we have put each group against one another.  It would seem that this is a new thing, we get surprised every time we hear someone has killed someone else.  Like it is an unbelievable thing for a human being to do, because why would a human intentionally hurt someone else?

In the past few years I have gone through what I like to call an enlightenment period.  I have begun to see the realities of life while also keeping faith that things are not all that bad all the time.  I have come to learn that the term humane needs a different meaning, that violence sells books, TV shows, and even the news.  The word humane means to have compassion towards another person or being, but there is very little compassion shown between human beings.

We are the one species that is capable of killing just for the sake of killing.  We have been doing it for years.  I was thinking about the animal kingdom and I have yet to see an animal kill another animal just because they could.  Animals kill each other to eat and survive, not because one of them was in the way.  Animals do not try to control each other, they just stay out of each other's way.  Humans could use a little lesson on that.  People kill each other out of jealousy, differences of opinion, or just as a form of control.

Even with rational minds, in the animal kingdom it seems we should be at the bottom of the list.  We can't accept each other, have healthy debates without someone insulting another person.  We can't have a different opinion because someone might get shot for it.  We can't have a different religion because someone might not like it.  We are so intolerant of one another that we divide ourselves in groups.  We become biased and take sides and then we wonder why there is such a thing.

Lately we have our attention between police officers and citizens, more specific African American citizens and the police.  A minority vs. a majority.  We are all in shock that this is happening and I wonder why we are in shock, this has been happening for years.  It is not just the police department, it is the justice system, the people who are supposed to protect others, politicians who are supposed to create the laws that supposedly keep people safe.  Instead of tolerating each other and talking about different ideas to make this country greater, we have been creating a separation between everyone.  One side thinks and feels they are better than the other and the other side feels oppressed by the side that feels they are better.

Then the side who feels is better gets hurt somehow because the oppressed side is able to get something change, so whenever possible the other side will punish the oppressed side harder.  This goes on and on in circles and it is never ending.  It won't end until we all realize that each of us needs to be more tolerant of each other.  It won't end until we leave the feelings of greatness and the feelings of oppression to the side and realize that under our skins we all look very much alike.  That each of our bodies will rot inside a hole in the ground.  It won't end until we stop diving people and realize that there are bad humans of every color, every ethnicity, and religion.  It won't end until we all accept that humans are the one animal capable of anything, that they can reason themselves to think that hurting someone else is a good thing.  History has shown us that and it seems that we still have not learned.

Randomness

I was sitting here thinking: "One should not spend money they have not yet acquired or spend all the money they have acquired."  That is the problem America has, we are a nation of spenders; every penny we get paid we spend.  We worked all our lives to pay for things and then when the time came to retire we had nothing to live on, so what did we do? We cried out and said: "Government help us." What did the government do? They created Social Security and said well we are going to take money off your paycheck and save it for when you retire because you are not capable of doing that on your own. 

Then the years passed and the plan proved to be flawed, there were not enough money being taken out of one person's paycheck in order to provide for that person's retirement, and people were living longer than government thought they would live.  Now, Social Security is not solvent and my generation will probably not get to ever use it.  Whose fault is that though?

 

Partly is our fault, our society is bred to be spenders.  We live off the idea that we can always get a new credit card, charge what we want and pay it later.  We believe that eventually we are going to make more money and then when we make more money we spend more money.  As I was sitting here thinking why in the hell do we do that? And all I could come up was because we are unhappy. 

It is a human condition to get rewarded for things we don't want to do, we go on a diet and after one week of eating only herbs we say: "Well I have been good this week, let me buy me an ice cream."  It is something that comes from many many generations ago, we clean our rooms because our parents promise that we will get something in return, the reward for stopping what we were doing (having fun) and doing something we do not like. 

And then as we grow older we are marked by our parents telling us how we have to make a living.  A child comes with a dream they have, they want to be an artist and the parent will feed that dream until the child reaches a certain age and then the parent will say: "You are too old for that, you need to think about how you are going to make a living.  You cannot make a living by being an artist."  This gets repeated so much that eventually the child ends up going to college (something they did not want to do) and studying something they did not want to study, and then getting a job they did not want to get. 

The child, now an adult, was conditioned to go and work at a job they will never enjoy but that "pays well."  So they go to work every day, they are miserable because they don't enjoy what they do, at the end of the work day or the work week they go home in all their misery to find something that will make them feel better.  Video games, alcohol, drugs, shopping, food... Anything that will reward them for doing something they did not like to do. 

And so there goes the money they make, they believe that they deserve to buy the video games, the alcohol, the drugs, the food, because they did something that was draining and that they did not enjoy.  Every few months they have to take a break from their jobs because "they deserve it", "they've earned it", they have worked so hard for so many months that now it is time to spend money on a vacation.  But wait!  They are still paying off the last vacation that they took, and then what? Well the credit card is almost paid off so we can use it again right now.  Then we will get back to our miserable jobs and complain about having to pay them off.

After this I was thinking: "what if the reason we have so many depressed people and angry people wanting to kill others all the time was that we are all so miserable because we are conditioned to do things that we completely dislike?"

Could you imagine a world where the child is never told that they should just make sure they go work at something that will pay them enough to live and instead we tell them to go follow their passion and put focus on that.  Tell them that yes it will be hard work but that it is something they can do.  Teach them that hard work is not despised when it is something we love to do. 

Then probably we would have less alcoholics, less drug addicts, less angry, depressed, and violent people around.  Because they would be focus on doing something they love to do and not something they have to do in order to survive and then maybe all these different things they spend money on would never be an issue, that extra money could be put away for retirement.  It could be put away to pay off a house so you do not have to worry about paying rent when you are no longer able to work.  It could be invested and made more rather than just spent.  People could even help each other more rather than compete with each other so much. 

Maybe if we learned how to be and remain happy and full of joy then we would not cry and cling for the help of the very people who thrive and advance their lives by making sure we continue to have the same problems. 

And Justice For All

Oh the legal system in the United States... We think of this country as one that is the most just but the reality is that it is not.  When it comes to family matters, the United States legal system is anything but... the law in every state suggests that when looking into family matters a judge should always think about the best interest of the child.  But what is the best interest of the child?
Each child is different and every person is different; when a case goes in front of a judge, the judge assumes based on presumptions that every child is the same and then makes a decision based on that assumption.  The judge also makes an assumption that because two parents show up to court they are both equally interested in the well being of the child.  Then we have this whole: get dressed for court... Another assumption is made here, dress nicely otherwise you are going to look like a crazy in front of the judge and well, more than likely the judge will prefer the other person.
Then we have the time a judge spends hearing arguments, sometimes it is just 15 minutes, sometimes less.  How can you possibly make a good decision based on that small amount of time? It's simply not possible.  What about those who are not able to afford an attorney that knows the law? Parties that go in front of a judge on their own, and do not really know their rights, or what they need or do not need to say.  The best interest of the child is rarely looked into in that case, no one is allowed to state what the child is feeling or explain the child's nature.  The presumption that a child is resilient and that they will eventually be fine no matter what situation you put them through is always there.
Then what about those that come in with attorneys and are in front of a judge and suddenly the judge says you better reach an agreement or I will have to.  Then attorneys go back behind the scenes and they use the "this is what the judge will do and you don't want that, so you better" in order to make the parties compromise into something that is more than likely not the best situation and definitely not in the best interest of the child, it's all merely legal bullying because even after being told to look at the benefit of the child and the child's emotions are put first, that is never the case, the child's emotions never come up in the discussion. 
Let me put it in a better way, there are two parents, one that has been gone for the entire life of the child and suddenly decides that they want to go ahead and be around.  They want to be call mom or dad, and they want to come into the child's life from one day to the next without easing themselves into being around them and getting to know them.  Their name on a piece of paper grants them legal right to do that it appears and because the basis of this system is still set up under the presumption that a child needs two parents in order to thrive, well we go ahead and grant the request.  A judge assumes that unless said parent is violent or has a psychological condition that is obvious to the world well the parent should be around. 
It never matters that the child has been happy and stable for their entire life, it only matters that someone that left and has never been around the child now comes in and says this is what I want and so it is granted because I have a right, a right that should not be called a right but a privilege.  The best interest of the child in a case like that would be to force the other parent to ease themselves into the child's life.  This is when we are faced with another presumption that judges make: if the case reaches their hands then it means the two people hate each other, that's why they cannot agree.  The judge never hears what went on and what each person was offering the other before they came in front of them, if they are there it means they hate each other.
We all proud ourselves in saying that we must protect children, they are the future of our country.  We assume that the law is there to do this for the children, but the truth is that the law is only there to serve the adults.  The children's feelings are never taken into consideration, it is hear say.  The children's stability and home environment being disrupted is not a big deal because hey! They are resilient and it is thought better for them to have two parents and not just one.  The law never looks at the rights of the children, they look at the wants of the adults and if one adult is wanting to speak up for the children, the adult is not allowed to do so because hey! That adult is related to the children therefore they want what they want for them not for the children.
The system is so flawed that we have put children to be with parents who are abusive and neglectful.  We send these children with a parent thinking that because they are related to the child by blood they will protect and care for the child.  This is how we put children in situations that they should never be put in, but that is the system and it will take a lot to change it.  Maybe it will be the new generations that will actually change this for the better.  The new generation that will shed light into the fact that a child does not necessarily need two parents, that if a child has not known anything different than having one parent in the house then it is not in the best interest of the child to suddenly force the child to be around someone they do not know.
The system we have put in place to protect children does not protect them, it rarely does.  It is a system that uses the word right when it should use the word privilege.  It is a privilege to be a parent not a right, and as such a parent should not be allowed to walk in and out of a child's life however they please.  There should be a limit to how many times a drug addict gets their children back, a limit of how many times a convicted felon gets a child back.  How many times must we send back and forth a child to an abusive or neglectful parent before we understand that at that point we are putting the rights and wants of the adult before the rights of the child.
In order for this system to work we have to move it forward from the thinking of our ancestors.  We have to have people who actually take their time making decisions for children and that make an effort to not just look at what the adults want but that actually look at the best interest of the child.  The best interest of a child is to life in a stable environment, happy and thriving, not to be put in a situation that they don't want to be put.  Every case should have a third party present, one that has looked into the child's life and that can speak objectively for the rights of the child, especially being that a judge assumes that two people hate each other and that's why they are in front of them, and if that is the case then send them to counseling.  It will not just help the child but it will help them.  Then look at the track record, if a person has not been in the life of a child and suddenly out of the blue wants to, what are the reasons behind it? Why now and not years ago? Has there really been a change, make it hard on them to get what they ask.  We make it too easy and there is not many people that are out there willing to change the system to truly protect the children.
We spend so much money protecting people that do not deserve protection, making sure that those who have broken the law are treated "fairly".  But when it comes to children, the future of this country, the people we can shape into good citizens, we do very little for.  Then when they turn into criminals we wonder what we did wrong.  It is like that throughout the country and it is a damn shame.  Maybe one day things will change and we will stop seeing news of children being abused and neglected by the same parents that the system sends them back to. Maybe one day we will have people on the bench that are not so closed up and caught up in an old way of thinking, one that does not work anymore.  Maybe one day we will truly see a just system, one where in every case the child's rights and feelings are truly taken into consideration.  Until then, I guess we just need to settle for a sub-part system; the one where convicted felons get a slap in the wrist only because we don't have the money to give them a nice well ventilated and lit cell with three meals a day.  The punishment that for most is not a punishment, they seem to actually not mind it and that is why they keep on committing crimes.  The system where children are constantly sent to abusive and neglectful parents or parents that really could care less about them and are only around because of some other ulterior motive.  Maybe one day we will see justice for all and not just for some.  And maybe one day we will actually truly protect the lives of children and not just pretend that we are doing it.

Hobby Lobby

I have been refraining from really offering my opinion on political issues lately simply because I am sort of tired of the debates back and forth and the none sense of it all. With that said, I've been bombarded with this Hobby Lobby ruling on all my social media feeds and I've read everyone's point of view and read all the "outrage" that the ruling has caused and just had so many thoughts about it that hey! I had to just put them all in writing....

Setting religion aside and with the thought of the Constitution of this wonderful country, here I go...

 

1. For all of those who are "outraged" because your women's rights are being violated because a company whose owners don't believe in certain forms of birth control is asking that they should not be forced to pay for it, let me stop you right there... First of all, just like every woman in this country has the right to do with her body what she wants, just like every woman in this country has the right to believe in whatever she wants, and just like every woman in this country has the right to choose what to purchase and pay for (except for now health insurance which every single woman in this country is forced to pay for maternity coverage even if it is impossible for them to get pregnant or they will have to pay a fine come tax season, and I will touch on this later) so does everyone else in this country has the same darn right. Therefore even if in a hypocritical way if the owners of Hobby Lobby want to not have to pay for certain forms of birth control then that is their right and they should not be forced to pay for it, regardless of what any of you really thinks. 

2. Let me remind all of you that the company you work for is under no obligation to offer any of you help with paying your health insurance, it is under no obligation to pay for your health insurance, it is the right of every company to choose what to offer as benefits to their employees just like it is your right as an employee to choose where you want to work, no on is telling you hey go and work here and this is where you have to work for the rest of your life and you are not ever going to have a choice in the matter. So please, if you don't like the benefits a company offers and that is something that is important to you then please quit bitching trying to force the company to offer something they don't want to offer and go find a company that offers something close to what you are asking (and I say something close to what you are asking because you are just not going to find what you think is a perfect company unless you create your own). And yes it is that simple, you don't like it, you have the right to change it, and the company has the same right as you do. 

3. On that note... Stop asking for your rights as an individual to be respected when you are not respecting the rights of other people. Yes, whether you like it or not, a company is not run by robots, it is run and owned by other people, citizens of this country who have the same rights to freedom of religion, freedom of speech, freedom of choice. To all of those saying that this company is run by hypocrites because they do business with people in China where after having one child if you get pregnant you have to have an abortion but the company owners are against abortion; you are all also being hypocrites because you are asking for rights to be respected but not wanting the rights of the owners of the company to be respected. The owners of the company again, have every right to do business with whoever they please to do business with, from a business perspective if it is more profitable to do business with someone in China vs someone in Canada then I will do business with the Chinese person regardless of what they believe in because let me tell you something: that is their given human right to believe in whatever they want to believe in and I have no say in it, it is business. 

4. I hope all of you having this "outrage" also realize that your Women's Rights were violated a long time ago when the Affordable Healthcare Act was passed by Congress and in it stated that you had to have certain kind of coverage under your health insurance plan otherwise you would face a penalty at the end of the year because you did not have the correct coverage. Your freedom of choice just went out the window, not just for us women but for everyone in this country, our government passed a law where it states that they know what is better for all of us and took away our right to choose what we want to pay for and what we don't.  People that rarely ever go to the doctor are forced to pay for plans that they will probably never use or else they have to pay a penalty. Women that are pass the child rearing age are forced to pay for maternity coverage they will not use (and let me tell you that is a big chunk of money on that insurance policy). Women who have had their tubes tied, have had a hysterectomy, or have been declared unable to ever have children also have to pay for this coverage or else they have to pay the penalty at the end of the year because whatever insurance they get was not enough according to our wonderful government. I have seen no outrage on any of this. Our rights as citizens of this country are being taken away by our government every single day and there are only a few of us that are painfully aware of it. Government was not created to tell people what they had to do with their lives, what they could and could not purchase and that is exactly what government is doing right now and it is all being hidden by little issues like this one where citizens of this country are fighting to gain back their rights and because of what our wonderful leaders are doing we, the citizens, end up being put against each other instead of uniting against those who are truly taking our rights from us.

5. Those so "outraged" are also the ones that preach for tolerance and how everyone else needs to change their views or respect other people's views. Well, how are you tolerating other people's views when you are posting to "boycott" a company because their views do not align with your own? This is the same thing that happened with Chick-fil-A, I am sorry I don't go to Chick-fil-A for their life views or beliefs, I go there because I like the chicken but I was probably put on the you are a bad person pile for going to buy the chicken I like to eat and believing that they have the right to believe in whatever the heck they want to believe in, they were not imposing that unto anyone, they were exercising their freedom of speech and freedom of choice just like you and I are doing right now, so before you start being "outraged" about something that is not really happening please step outside your little circle where the only ones that exist are you guys and where everyone that goes to fight for their rights is completely in the wrong unless they are fighting for the same thing you are fighting for, think! Just think for one minute about who the real enemies are here. Read and educate yourself about these issues, you still have a choice and no one is imposing that choice on you (except again the government and its mandated insurance) and if you preach tolerance for your views then have tolerance for the views of other people, tolerance means you don't attack others for how they believe, you accept that is how they believe and they in turn accept how you believe. Hobby Lobby is not trying to change your views or impose their views on you, all they are really trying to do is get back that piece of freedom our Constitution states we all have.